Newswise — It's not unusual for students graduating from college to thank their parents, particularly their mothers, for being there for them during the years spent toiling for their degrees. But in Aillen Aponte's case, maternal devotion reached extraordinary heights, as her mother dedicated her life to caring for Aillen, who was born with cerebral palsy and wheelchair-bound.
A payback of sorts comes this June for her mother, Sergia Liz, when she will accompany her daughter into the Theater at Madison Square Garden on June 6 to accept a bachelor's degree in human services from New York City College of Technology as the salutatorian, the second in her class, with the highest academic honor of summa cum laude. Her grade point index was 3.83 out of a possible 4.0.
"I have always put my heart and soul into everything I do and pushed myself hard in school to make sure my mother's sacrifices have not been in vain," says 23-year-old Aillen, who was on the Dean's List every semester. "Mom didn't have the chance to graduate from high school, so my graduating from college is for the both of us."
And Aillen will very quickly go even further. She applied to four colleges for their master's in social work programs and was accepted by all four. She is now deciding between Hunter College and NYU and will start her graduate studies this fall.
Her reason for choosing a career as a social worker focusing on children with disabilities has everything to do with her mother. "When I was born, my mother was a single mom working in a factory making staplers and didn't speak English," she explained. "When I was diagnosed with cerebral palsy at seven months, the doctors and social workers didn't explain anything to her about my disability. She went home and cried and cried. In the Dominican Republic, where she's from, disability was nothing anyone talked about. She knew I was developmentally delayed and thought I had some kind of mental illness.
Without telling anyone she was leaving New York or what was wrong with her child, Sergia took her infant to Massachusetts, where her sister-in-law lived and brought her to Children's Hospital in Boston. It was there that she finally got the services she needed for Aillen.
"My mother is a real fighter and doesn't take 'no' for an answer; I've learned so much from her," Aillen explains. "When I began college and needed a personal assistant to accompany me, we were told that home attendants could not be used this way. My mother threatened to file a lawsuit and the upshot was that I got the assistant.
"I want to offer families the help and support system my mom didn't have," adds Aileen, who would like to work in the Hispanic community in a clinical setting with children up to three years old, counseling their parents, arranging for physical therapy and other services. "My mom is overprotective of me to this day and I think it's because she didn't have a base of support when I was born."
In addition to her mother, who accompanied her to class when she was between personal assistants, Aillen thanks her stepfather, who for the past four years has been driving her to and from City Tech. "I tried at first depending on Access-a-Ride but often arrived on campus after my class was over. My stepfather is self-employed and has a flexible schedule, so it worked out," she says.
In elementary school, Aillen wasn't really aware that she was severely disabled. "I always went to mainstream schools and was very popular with a lot of friends. Kids I didn't know would say, 'You're handicapped,' and I grew to hate that word. But when younger children would question why I was different from them, I would say the only difference was that I sit in this chair and my mom helps me use the bathroom and I really believed it."
Junior high school proved to be a rude awakening, as she and her friends became interested in boys. "When I liked a boy he would invariable come over to me and say, 'What do you want with me; you're in a chair.' That's when I realized the extent of my disability."
At City Tech, Aillen realized that she was capable of more than she thought and had mentors pushing her and serving as a support system. In particular, she cites human services professors Martin Garfinkle and Richard Holm, department chairperson Justine Pawlukewicz and student support counselor Angela Ellis and says, "I hope I can be half the professionals they are. Interacting with the teachers and students at City Tech allowed me to realize that no matter how alone you might feel or how difficult a situation may seem, there are people who are more than happy to help."
As part of her degree requirements in human services, Aillen interned as a vocational counselor at the Brooklyn Bureau of Community Service and as an assistant to the coordinator of volunteer services at Cerebral Palsy Associations of New York State, where she learned an important lesson that "not all people who have cerebral palsy experience the condition the same way. I also learned to be more assertive and outgoing in dealings with my internship supervisor."
She also participated in such extra curricular activities at City Tech as the Human Services Club, the Toys for Tots program and a conference on domestic violence co-sponsored by the Brooklyn District Attorney's Office. In addition, she was part of the CUNY-wide Student Disability Coalition.
Aillen is an only child. She and her family are members of the Incarnation Roman Catholic Church in Washington Heights, where they live.
New York City College of Technology (City Tech) of The City University of New York is a recognized national model for urban technological education and a pioneer in integrating technology into the teaching/learning experience. The largest public college of technology in New York State, City Tech enrolls more than 12,000 students in 57 baccalaureate, associate and specialized certificate programs. Another 14,300 students enroll annually in adult education and workforce development programs, many of which lead to licensure and certification. Located at 300 Jay Street in Downtown Brooklyn, City Tech is at the MetroTech Center academic and commercial complex, convenient to public transportation.
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